Bondage for Beginners: 6 Tips to Help Get You Started

Bondage is a popular kink, and a great one for that matter. This guide on bondage for beginners provides 6 tips to help get you started.

Are you looking to spice things up with bondage in the bedroom?

Whether people openly admit it or not, bondage is an incredibly popular kink. You shouldn’t feel weird about being interested in it.

If you’re a newbie to bondage, though, there are a few things that you need to know. It’s one of the kinks that can go wrong before you know it if you aren’t careful. Don’t risk hurting yourself or a partner; do your research first.

We’re here with a quick guide for bondage for beginners so you can get started in a safe way. Keep reading for everything that you need to know.

1. Discuss Boundaries Ahead of Time

Boundaries are everything when it comes to a safe and enjoyable bondage session. Some people get it into their heads that bondage is all about the dominant party doing whatever they like, but this isn’t true.

It’s an activity that should result in mutual enjoyment. Both partners matter and they should both have a say in what is and isn’t okay with them. Bondage is tricky and it can be dangerous, so having these conversations ahead of time is important.

That said, boundaries are fluid and they may change over time as both parties get more comfortable with the idea. Keep having these conversations throughout your relationship so that you and your partner stay on the same page.

2. Start Slow

You don’t want to dive into bondage headfirst. If you’ve seen examples of bondage play in pornography or movies, you might be inclined to pull out all of the heavy-duty equipment on your first try, but ignore this feeling and start slow.

It’s a good idea to start with something like a blindfold alone. While this isn’t as exciting as full-blown bondage, it’s a great way to dip your feet into sensory deprivation without any risks.

After this, try other sensory objects like ice cubes, pillows, and gentle whipping. You can bind wrists or angles with scarves to get a feel for how both partners react.

3. Seek an Online Community

It’s a good idea to seek out a community when you’re first getting started.

Some areas have thriving BDSM and bondage communities, but they’re not easy to find. They don’t tend to make themselves obvious.

Seeking out communities online can help you find nearby “real life” communities, but it also gives you a wider range of people to talk to. It’s a great way to have open discussions and get advice in a place that’s free of judgment. You may even get a few ideas from more experienced bondage users.

Bondage is still a niche subject, but a quick Google search will introduce you to a plethora of communities. Make sure to be safe when you’re browsing these websites, though. Like any other sexual websites and groups, there may be people lurking who want to manipulate other users.

4. Use Soft Materials

Don’t jump into bondage by using rough ropes and metal. You don’t want to hurt your partner in a serious way or you may both be disinclined to try again.

While rougher and harder materials may come in the future, start with things that are soft and smooth. Scarves are great for this, as are soft ropes that are made for the bedrooms, the traditional furry handcuffs, and soft pleather or leather.

Your binding shouldn’t scratch or pinch. Those feelings are distracting and they aren’t part of the play session. As you progress, you and your partner may find that you’re more interested in the added discomfort, but give yourselves time to figure that out.

5. Never Use Something that You Can’t Unlock

This is crucial. In movies, there’s a trope that involves people being unable to get out of their handcuffs when one partner loses the key. Don’t run into a stressful, dangerous, or embarrassing situation. If the bondage locks, keep the key where you can find it and keep a spare key nearby at all times.

When you’re getting started, it’s a good idea to use something that your partner can get out of if they need to. Sometimes things go wrong and you need to break free right away.

Velcro handcuffs are a great starting tool for bondage beginners because they’re easy to undo. After this, cuffs with belt closures are easy enough to remove for play sessions.

6. Use a Safeword or Gesture

Some people think that safewords are outdated and only used in tropes, but we disagree. When you’re new to bondage, you want to know that you and your partner can stop on a dime. Communication isn’t always easy in the heat of the moment, so having a safeword is helpful.

It should be something unusual that wouldn’t otherwise be used during sex. Many people who use bondage choose to role play in some way, so a simple “no” doesn’t suffice.

If your bondage includes some kind of silencing tool, like a gag, safewords aren’t effective. In this case, use a safe noise or a gesture such as a tap on the arm or leg.

You can use a system that’s similar to flag systems in sports, or traffic lights. For example, one tap could mean “stop this action” or “slow down” while two taps could mean “stop completely.”

Pick a system that works for you and your partner.

Bondage for Beginners: Are You Ready to Try?

Bondage is fun and it’s a great way to bond and spice things up in the bedroom. Even if you find that it isn’t an every night activity, it’s good to try new things so you keep your relationship fresh and interesting.

Are you looking for some great toys to get into bondage for beginners? We’ve got what you need. Check out our supply of bondage toys and get what you need to start playing.